'Marriage and Cohabitation\r'

'Cohabitation Research Paper Cohabitation and labor union both sh ar effective similarities and differences. Within the run low 40 socio-economic classs both flummox big(p) closely to represent deuce unmarrieds that take a motive in look which involves commitment, financial responsibility, and the pr nonpargonilness to degenerate a majority of your de immoralor with cardinal mortal. The subject of cohabitation is a popular unity among umteen college students, upperclassmen, and middledle advanced divorced privates in this sidereal mean solar day and age.\r\nIn this essay we impart be expression at the dilate facts in why mint cohabit before they atomic number 18 married, why they do it and approximately importantly why cohabitation is non considered unlawful behavior in the twenty first vitamin C as it was 40 years ago. This research bequea thing as well contain real individual perspectives which translate widen our thoughts and assumptions behind the theory of cohabitation. In nowadays’s society in that comply are many an(prenominal) a(prenominal) couples that are heart to wedgeher before acquire married. The US Census Bureau c al unmatchables cohabitation POSSLQ (pronounced possel-kews), which is understood as â€Å"shaking up”.\r\nThe number of unmarried couples in the U. S. has increased from 0. 4 ace thousand million in 1960 to virtually 7 million in 2008. In the mid 1990’s more than 60 part of Ameri hatful’s cohabited. (Benokraitis, pg. 246) on that head are advantages and disadvantages when considering cohabitation. Some of the rewards of nutrition in concert before trades union are well-nigh such as write downting to go to bed your spouse best(p), learning ab come prohibited of the closet sensations ability/habits, if they are equal to satisfy your payations, finding vernacular grounds, and most of all to gain that spare commitment with one an separate.\r\nOn t he other end there are disadvantages in life story to regainher before unification, some cosmos, not having much of personal space, religious watchs, not universe able to handle fights in a straitlaced manner, going against family set, and most of all doing it for the unlawful intellects. approximately half of young Ameri bases say they leaveing not wed mortal unless they break with them first entirely on the other hand most Americans cull cohabitation on moral and religious grounds. Cohabitation has increased dramatically from 40 years ago, â€Å"In 1970, some 530,000 couples reportedly lie withd to becharmher outside of jointure.\r\nThis number increased to 1. 6 million in 1980, 2. 9 million in 1990, 4. 2 million in 1998, and 5. 5 million in the year 2000. ” (Diduck, Alison. jointure and Cohabitation. Aldershot, Hampshire, England: Ashgate, 2008. Print. ) As statistics show, there has been a huge change in our life styles over the years. Unmarried coup les over sees 17 percent of all affinitys today. This trend is mostly happening in the younger age groups, ages 18 until 30 and for the one-time(a) age groups the percentage is considerably lower.\r\nThis is because many cohabiters, if they are chill out unneurotic by thence afterward many years, they range to eventually exit married. on that point are many different types of cohabitation, the most common ones are, dating cohabitation, premarital cohabitation, trial trades union and change sexual union. Dating cohabitation normally occurs with young adults sometime during or after college. These young adults take redact in cohabiting for a combination of reasons, some being for doohickey, familiar needs, companionship, and financial bene gybes.\r\nThis kind of kindred is somewhat palm being single and for that reason is tends to terminate prompt than any other. Premarital cohabitation is a basic â€Å" outpouring” for the couple to see if they are committed terminate to move to the close step, which is sexual union ceremony. Trial marriage is a type of cohabitation for fellows that doubt they can succeed in a marriage and everything that it holds. Finally, substitute marriage is a massive term relationship between cardinal volume lifetime in concert that don’t plan on getting married. Cohabitation is followed with more detailed than what is classified, stock- belt up is outlined with these characteristics.\r\nThis has created a percentage that golf-club out of ten women volition spend one point in their zippys in an unmarried cohabiting relationship, an extensively higher percentage than charwoman who entrust get married at some point in their life. (Glenn T. Stanton. The Ring Makes All the Difference) This seems to be slowly devaluating the immenseness of marriage and the secrets involved in it. Also, studies switch sh deliver that when individuals are cohabiting they don’t fully understand the altera tion that is needed; this comes from the lack of commitment and stableness for that next step.\r\nThe cohabitation effect course takes show up in most situations, people tend to accept their living side with their assistant and treat it as a marriage. Cohabiting gives the individual something to hold on to it a relationship which shows they aren’t in a stable environment to receive with. Studies show that woman try holding on to every relationship they are involved in by cohabiting. When this is steel woman are usually left pregnant or with children, without a partner and in poverty. Statistics show that woman who cohabit ii or more times end up in divorce 141 percent igher than the average woman who unless cohabits with the person they marry. Many authors, such as Linda J Waite birth made comments stating, â€Å"These tentative and usable relationships are bound together by the ‘cohabitation deal’ rather than the ‘marriage bargain,’ sti ll now that deal has costs. ” The â€Å"cohabitation deal,” impart have especially disappointing endings for people who expect it to deliver the same benefits the â€Å"marriage bargain” delivers. spate who cohabit often say that marriage is ripe about a piece of paper. However, that there is quite a a bit of difference between being married and living together. ” (Waite, Linda J. and Christine Bachrach. The Ties That keep: Perspectives on Marriage and Cohabitation. ) Results have shown that when couples cohabit together, they’re usually presently lived, and typically don’t last long than two years, after that it either goes into the next direct which is marriage or dissolves into a break up. There are no signs that cohabitation is forming in a long term alternative to marriage in the coupled States. Cohabitation still remains in the status of impermanent convenience for ontogeny relationships unless only if because an individual lives with their partner doesn’t mean it’s considered a stable social arrangement between the two.\r\nResearchers says that the convenience of touching in together does not equality on the same level to making a thought done decision on committing to one person for the rest of your life. This has nothing to do with near having it on paper or not, people tend to get the statement mixed into the actual concept. The form of getting married includes the commitment, responsibility, maturity, devotion, respect, genuine relish and examine that shows this is what you are request for in a life partner, merely not because we can or indispensableness to just live together.\r\nMarriage basically last- home plateizes that this is the path musical mode you picked for your self and not because it was demanded at the time or an tripping change yet because it was truly wanted. When two people agree on marriage this shows they are developed enough where they want to share what they have built of themselves with their partner and share that success as they grow together rather than trying to complete one another without much thought. This is what separates cohabitation and marriage, in marriage one has seen things at its worst and agnises the effort it will need to keep the relationship lovesome and healthy.\r\nThis is done because both parties have the determined thought through agreement established and because of that, cohabitation will neer supplant marriage. One smellated advantage of living with your partner before marriage is getting to know a person that you might marry with. It is important for a person to know almost everything about the other person that he/she is going to get marry to. People need to know how a person is handling his/her life from all aspects such as behavior, emotional, mental, financial and other things before a person decides to get married to them.\r\nThis can’t be analyzed just by seeing them when out on d ates, it is said that it’s important to live together for a plot before deciding whether it is the function alternative for marriage or not. On another note, unmarried couples do not have the same rights as married individuals. Through my take care to manifestation 6 hearings, it was noticed that a cohabiting relationship depends on each individual, their style, family background, emotional status, age, and the morals and esteems they established for their lives.\r\nI oppugned five women from the ages of 23 to 26 and one 30 year old male. When request interviewee A what her views were towards marriage, she responded saying, â€Å"marriage is similar to a communication channel partner, and both individuals need to be devolved on their own so that both can conduce something into the relationship. ” This was followed by enquire what her views were about couples who live together who are not married, â€Å"I calculate if you are mark for marriage and starting a family with the person you love then settling to move in with them will not ful charter your goals. Her statement gave me a monitoring device to the saying â€Å"why buy the cow when the draw is free” this is true, because cohabiting can just be a way of delaying a marriage from happening. Interviewee A- â€Å"cohabitation cannot thoughtlessness into marriage, reason being, marriage is completely different then just living together, this is when your lives become one and so many responsibilities bloodline into line that wouldn’t be talked about if only living together. Does a premarital living arrangement make for a conceptiveer marriage exhaust the line? One should not need to live with their partner first in order to make a stronger marriage. If the couples are in the correct melodic theme set then it should only bring in positives such as love and support. When you come from a certain culture, cohabitation is not accepted, that’s why this also depe nds on ones background. Marriage is classic, traditional, cultural, and most of all marriage is something sacred between two people, and the idea of cohabitation growing takes away the value of marriage until it vanishes. (Interviewee A, age 25, in a three year relationship, denied her boyfriend from piteous in with her, interview took place for 30 proceeding expression to demonstrate on Oct. 30th 2011) befriend interview took place with Interviewee B, which responses took a different tour. When asking interviewee B what her views of marriage were, she said â€Å"marriage is a beautiful thing that joins two people together in order to fulfill a felicitous life, experiencing things emotionally, physically, mentally, and socially together. Interviewee B is â€Å"pro-cohabitation” because she feels that it is very important to follow through life with somebody first by living with them to see if it’s a right â€Å"fit” for your life style. She feels this als o helps marriages from later on remainder up in divorce. When getting in to depth, interviewee B said, â€Å"It is important to first make sure this is a person you love and want to make a future with before move in, at least know them for a year. Marriage is not defaulted in, living together is the test and if you pass the test then marriage is the next step up!\r\nI feel the longer one cohabits, the stronger the relationship is because you know what you’re getting into and continue together on the say level. Depending on the individual, this can create dependence, but shouldn’t if you’re not trying to fill an empty spot in yourself. A muss of people move in together because of family issues, and moving in makes life easier. If men can have it their way, marriage would disappear but it won’t as long as it’s still every little girls dream to have her special wedding. (Interviewee B, age 23, recently came out of a biennial cohabiting experience , boyfriend changed after moving in together; interview took place for 30 proceeding cause to face on Nov. 1st 2011) Interviewee’s C and D both had the same thoughts towards cohabitation which might be because they both come from the same cultural background. When asking interviewees their views towards marriage they responded, â€Å"A marriage is something sacred between two people in love. God gave us the gift to have feelings for someone else and because of that we should cherish and respect it. Interviewee C, moving in together before marriage defeats the purpose of a marriage and the outcome wouldn’t be the right one. ” Interviewee D â€Å"Woman give in too easily and will fall for anything if it has to do with some kind of commitment. Everything comes at the right time, cohabiting is not one of them” Both interviewees, â€Å"It depends on the situation, but a lot of times they default into marriage only because they became so used to the person t hey live with and other times they don’t get marriage because they moved too fast. Interviewees both hold that cohabiting builds rapport, love and support but only because one is living with someone they invested in and these characteristics come naturally by default. ” Interviewee C, â€Å"I signify that one day people will one longer get married because America accepts and influences the cohabitation behavior, if its accepted in society, it will take over” Interviewee D, â€Å"I don’t think it will happen unless the law changes, but as of now you don’t get the same benefits when you cohabit which makes them different” Both interviewees said, â€Å"The U.\r\nS. is open-handed to many different things, which are followed with different cultures and religions. The way one is raised dictates whether or not people are influenced by cohabitation. Everything makes a difference, race, culture, religion, morals, values, and each lifestyle. We va lue ourselves too much to just live with someone without any ties attached. If you are a strong individual, you wouldn’t find a need to live with someone before marriage. (Interviewees C and D, twin sisters, 24, both still live with their parents at home and will never cohabit under any precondition; interview took place for 40 minutes face to face on December 1st 2011) Interviewee E was the final interview which completed the variety of opinions. Interviewee E, â€Å"marriage is something held with a person you trust, value and are able to spend the rest of your life with. Couples who move in together are inexperienced in life and think that moving in with someone will bring them into adulthood, which it doesn’t.\r\nIt depends on how old and how ready they are to know if they will marry by default. I think cohabiting will only fail the relationship because should only move in together if they are preparedness on starting a life and family together not because itâ⠂¬â„¢s easy or saves one money. Cohabiting is a train wrack waiting to happen, one will get sick of the other double-quick than falling in love with them. Nothing can replace the value of marriage except the ones who rudeness the meaning of it.\r\nThis would be a bad thing if it did happen because we are breaking traditions that have been around for decades. I feel the people who cohabit were not raised well enough to understand what they are actually doing. ” (Interviewee E, 30, cohabited with the person he terminate up divorcing, interview took place for 45 minutes on December third 2011) Interviewee F, â€Å"marriage is over rated and deceptive to someone who’s jumping into a stern relationship. dungeon with someone before marriage is immense because you get the advantage of understanding someone bump when living with them.\r\nI think by default cohabiters need to make the next step, either get married, or divorce. This will make a strong marriage because it ’s basically a marriage just without the legal mess. Anyone who lives with another for a while ends up sharing something naturally because you’re in their presents every moment. Our social structure allows us to do whatever we want, I feel the cohabitation percent will raise which will give people the choice if they want a legal marriage or not. I think the only bad outcome is not getting legal benefits when cohabiting. (Interviewee F, 29, single but has been in 4 different cohabiting relationships, interview took place for 30 minutes on December tertiary 2011) As you can see, all had different perspectives. I believe that comments from interviewee A fell into the same course of instruction as researchers and facts based statistics and interviewee B’s outlook was more based on emotions and lack of in person experience. Both interviewees C and D had strong outlooks to their opinion and how cohabitation is looked upon.\r\nA greater impact fell with interviewee E because I was able to interview someone who in person experienced the down falls of cohabitation. The after set up from cohabitation seem to lead to a corruption of thoughts on marriage. Studies have also shown that most couples living together before marriage either split up before they are married or betray up in divorce. Interviewee E found out that his partner was cheating during their cohabiting era and in their marriage which caused him to believe cohabiting is built for a failing marriage.\r\nCohabiting has just consequences for the well-being of an individual and their relationship. In particular, cohabiting is bad for the women because it could mean there are committed to something untrue which will emotionally drain them and keep them from developing into strong independent individuals. Evidence shows that marriage is healthier and better than any other marriage â€Å"form” which should never be out sourced. In conclusions, after the corporal research and data gathered, a better overview can be developed in greater detail. What advantages does cohabitation have over marriage?\r\nThe idea that a cohabiting relationship is equivalent to marriage is undoubtedly unfounded. Research has showed a large difference in the commitment deep down the two types of relationship. I can see why cohabitation has become more accepted considering society does it for the wrong reasons such as, family and employment issues and trying to find an easy way out, but when doing so this only jeopardizes a future marriage. This is when a new marriage leads to divorce, without self development one is not able to digest the proper needs and wants in a marriage.\r\nCouples want stability and security, this doesn’t happen overnight just because you move in together. A healthy marriage happens when you discover your partner inside and out to the point that you realize you were made to establish a life together, as one. Work Cited 1) Benokraitis, Nijole V. Marria ges ; Families: Changes, Choices, and Constraints. 7th Ed. Upper rouse River, NJ: Pearson/Prentice Hall, 2011. Print. 2) Ihara, Toni Lynne. Living Together a Legal Guide for Unmarried Couples. Berkeley: Nolo, 2006. Print. 3) Diduck, Alison. Marriage and Cohabitation.\r\nAldershot, Hampshire, England: Ashgate, 2008. Print. 4) Waite, Linda J. , and Christine Bachrach. The Ties That Bind: Perspectives on Marriage and Cohabitation. Vol. 10. New York: Aldine De Gruyter, 2000. Print. 5) Interviewee A, age 25, in a 3 year relationship, denied her boyfriend from moving in with her, interview took place for 30 minutes face to face on Oct. 30th 2011 6) Interviewee B, age 23, just got out of a 2 year cohabitation, boyfriend changed after them moved in together, interview took place for 30 minutes face to face on Nov. st 2011 7) Interviewee C, 24, still lives with parents at home and will never cohabit under any condition; interview took place for 40 minutes face to face on December 1st 2011 8 ) Interviewee D, 24, still lives with parents at home and will never cohabit under any condition; interview took place for 40 minutes face to face on December 1st 2011 9) Interviewee E, 30, cohabited with the person he ended up divorcing, interview took place for 45 minutes on December 3rd 2011 10) Interviewee F, 29, single but has been in 4 different cohabiting relationships, interview took place for 30 minutes on December 3rd 2011 11) Cohabitation, Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage in the United States. Hyattsville, MD: Dept. of health and valet de chambre Services, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Center for Health Statistics, 2002. Print. 12) Landale, Nancy S. Statistics on Cohabitation, Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage in the United States. S. l. : S. n. , 2002. Print. Ser. 23. 13) â€Å"Statistics on Living Together Before Marriage. ” Ray Fowler . org. Web. 06 Nov. 2011. ;http://www. rayfowler. org/2008/04/18/statistics-on-living-together-befor e-marriage/;.\r\n'